Right Man Right Woman
Before you begin your Bible study, as a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ, be
sure you have named your sins privately to God the Father.
If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to
cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
(Known, Unknown and Forgotten sins) (1Jn 1:9)
You will then be in fellowship with God, Filled with the Holy Spirit and ready to
learn Truth from the Word of God.
"God is spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in Spirit and Truth,"
(John 4:24)
THE TRAGIC MISTAKE
Other than believing in Jesus Christ, which is the greatest decision in life,
the next most important decision any member of the human race can make is
that of choosing the right person as a lifetime partner. The right man must find
the right woman; the right woman must find the right man. Anything else is — as
close as you will come to that phrase (Which is a misnomer) — “hell on earth.”
Hell is in hell, and it’s future; but if anyone wanted to describe “hell on earth” in
one sentence marriage to the wrong woman or to the wrong man would be it!
One of the greatest causes of suffering in life comes from marrying and or
marrying the wrong person.
The past generation seems to be made up of a preponderance of people
who made a mistake in their marriage! Most of them have enough fortitude to
stick it out — for the sake of the children or society, or their jobs. Sadly
enough, since young people today have even less integrity than the past
generation, they are going to make the same mistake because of the
widespread use of drugs and alcohol, the rise of the neo-gypsy movement, the
loose attitude toward sex, and the phasing out of the Bible.
The reasons for marrying the wrong person are numerous: a person is on
a wave of libido; (Sexual desire) he is living in panic palace; he is lonely; his
friends are all getting married and he is left behind; he uses as an excuse some
difficult or bitter situation at home. You young people who have yet to make the
decision for marriage would do well to take note of these tragedies and avoid
them at all costs. The only hope of this present generation, as in any
generation, is the Word of Truth.
Through a Spiritual knowledge of Truth, you will acquire the Spiritual
maturity to know that loneliness or a rapport which occurs in friendship is never
enough reason for marriage. The anguish of soul and the misery which can
come from making this fatal mistake can never be calculated; and were it not
for Truth, those who make this mistake would not survive. Many of you are
suffering terribly right now because you have dreams, but you do not have the
reality of those dreams! (False human reality vs. GOD’S REALITY)
Now there is much adverse reaction to the Doctrine we are about to
discuss. One reason that so many of us have a difficult time adjusting to what is
so obviously God’s will and God’s Word, is that for years we have been guilty
of every type of malpractice. While some would never step out of line overtly, in
the mind many people who have been married or single for years have
sublimated by having a mental romance with others — someone in your church
or in an organization or social circle where you travel constantly. The fact that
you have a mind that wanders, the fact that many of you have a physical
relationship with your opposite number, and yet he or she is never in your mind,
undoubtedly explains your reaction to this Truth!
I want you to ask yourself some important questions: is the romantic
image you have set up in your mind more important than the Word of Truth? Is
anything more important than God and His Thinking? (NOTHING IS!)
You young people must not allow the adverse reaction of the older
generation to affect in anyway your understanding of the Truth of right man —
right woman, for there is for each of you a right man or a right woman, and that
right man or right woman is worth waiting for. Do not be snowed by the
comments you might hear from certain adults who are merely grown-up
children, such as, “Well, there are a number of women with whom I could be
happy.” (Or vice versa) As we examine the Scripture on the subject, you will
discover that the Truth of right man — right woman is illustrated by the Lord
and the Church, or the Lord and Judah. Just as there is one Lord for the
believer, so there is one man for one woman. Few will deny the first half of this
analogy; many deny the second. But the Scripture is equally clear on both.
Therefore, it becomes important to study the passages which establish the
authenticity of this Doctrine.
THE PATTERN ESTABLISHED AT CREATION
We find that many women resent their role in the world. Today we even
have the Women’s Liberation Movement. But the woman’s punishment in the
Garden determined her role in life. God is absolute justice and cannot be unfair;
for this reason, the woman’s place is fair and right because it is God’s plan for
her. In order to understand this, we must begin with the creation in,
(Gen 2:21-25) where the pattern of the right man — right woman was
established.
So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept;
then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The LORD
God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and
brought her to the man. The man said, "This is now bone of my bones, And
flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of
Man." (Gen 2:21-23)
The time between the creation of man and man’s original sin is unknown;
but it was apparently long enough for it to become a test. How time was
measured in perfection is also unknown. The fact that there was day and night
from Genesis, Chapter 1, in the restoration of the earth, would indicate that
there was a 24- hour day. Apart from that, we have no measurement of time
except that it is assumed that a long time elapsed before the man and the
woman got around to sinning,
(Around, one hundred years; Gen 4:25; Gen 5:1-7)
Everything that occurred during the time that man and woman lived in
perfection in the Garden was of-course, happiness and pleasure! One of the
characteristics of perfection was perfect environment. Sex and the relationship
between the man and the woman was a part of perfect environment. However,
when man acquired a sin nature and was no longer under any condition of
perfect environment, a question arises immediately: is it possible to perpetuate
something from the age of perfection and still have all of the glory and the
blessing for which the relationship of the right man and the right woman was
designed? The answer is YES! (Only maximized by living as Spiritually mature
believers; in the Spiritual life; Rom 4:20)
When God designed right man — right woman before man sinned, and
when God perpetuated this on the other side of sin, He made provision for this
relationship to be of utmost happiness. In fact, we are actually going to study a
verse a little later in which it says in effect that although unbelievers may have a
miserable life, they will derive from the marriage relationship fantastic
happiness, even in the midst of all other sorrows and difficulties of life, if they
find their right man or right woman. Such is the case in the relationship between
the man and the woman described in Genesis 2.
In, (Gen 2:20) we find that Adam is busy giving names “to all cattle, and to
the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field...” Adam was a genius: he
was able to categorize all of creation without having anyone or anything after
which to name all of these categories. Now, inevitably, there comes a time
when the “five o’clock whistle blows,” and man is through with his work. No
matter how tired he is, he wants to play or relax. Apart from something
designed for man to express all that is in his soul and all that is in his body, it is
also inevitable that he is going to be lonely. As Adam went through the animal
kingdom naming the animals, it became obvious that he could not be on a basis
of intimacy with the animal creation... “...But for Adam there was not found a
helper suitable for him.” Adam was actually designed so that BY HIMSELF he
could never be fulfilled as a member of the human race. The word “helper” in
the Hebrew means more than just helper. It denotes implementation and
fulfilment. “Suitable” means counterpart or complementary part: the part that
fits; him. While man in his original creation had a soul, a spirit and a body, man
is not an island unto himself. He needed a counterpart. There had to be
something that fitted him completely — soulishly, Spiritually, physically, and in
every way that two members of the human race go together.
God had no intention of allowing Adam’s loneliness to continue; and just as
God provided for Adam, so God has provided for every member of the human
race in one of two ways: He provides either a right man or right woman; or He
provides a particular Spiritual gift for a few believers in order to function without
a counterpart. This was the case of Paul. He had the Spiritual gift of celibacy.
This gift is rare and is used within the framework of God’s plan. But the general
design for the human race is that for every man God has designed a female
counterpart and that one without the other is incomplete.
So the Lord, (Jehovah Elohim — Jesus Christ) caused a deep sleep to fall
upon Adam. While he slept, God took out one of his ribs, and from this rib
would come a lot of man’s happiness as well as a lot of man’s troubles. I often
think that the Lord may have chuckled at this point. However, in perfect
environment, without a sin nature and with benefit of constant visitation from
God, it was impossible to have any marital problems.
From the rib which He had taken from man, the Lord made a woman. The
Hebrew word for “made” here is “banah,” rather than any of the usual words for
“create.” “Bara,” which means “to make something out of nothing,” and “asah,”
which means to make something out of something,” both emphasize the
creation of the soul, with reference to essence and personality. A third word,
“jatsar,” means “to fashion” or “to mold,” but is used for the creation of the male
body only. When it came to making woman — and I love this — the word used
means “to build.” God BUILT a woman. “Banah” emphasizes the body rather
than the soul.
The soul is the “image of God.” God’s essence is invisible and the soul is
invisible. The real person is not seen, though the essence of the soul becomes
manifest. It has self-consciousness, mentality, volition, emotion, conscience,
and, after the fall, an old sin nature. The woman had a soul, but her body is
emphasized in this statement. We could never improve on either the
phraseology or the Concept. She had to be perfect because God built her.
Anything God makes is perfect. Her beauty must have been beyond anything
we can imagine.
Adam didn’t know what he needed, but God Knew — and this is very
important — He brought the woman to the man! He did not hide her somewhere
and tell Adam to find her; God brought her to him. Every time the right man and
the right woman get together, whether believer or unbeliever — remember that
this is for the human race — there is a sense in which God brings it about; He
brings the woman to the man. Now, this doesn’t mean that you sit in the park
and wait until what appears to be an angel leads a beautiful doll right to your
park bench. That is misapplication of the faith-rest technique!
We also have the panic-button crowd who think that the first Christian they
meet is their opposite number. Then we have the cynical crowd who don’t
believe the Truth of the right man — right woman. And there’s the philandering
crowd — the haremsville bunch who say, “One woman — me? Huh!” In
between, there are those who sit tight and exercise faith-rest.
There is a principle involved in God’s bringing the woman to the man: God
always provides in grace. When it came to the Cross, God provided Salvation
through Jesus Christ. We do not deserve it; we cannot earn it.
For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of
yourselves, it (Salvation) is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no
one may boast. (Eph 2:8-9)
As believers, we are under the “much more” grace of God:
He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how
will He not also with Him freely give us all things? (Rom 8:32)
When God brought the woman to the man, He did not bring a creature with
two heads, called a female; He didn’t bring two creatures — two women; nor
did He bring half a creature. He brought one for one! Adam responded to this
gift. He took one look at her and saw immediately that she was different from
him, since they were both naked; but he also recognized that she was his
counterpart. Adam and learned Truth personally from the Lord Jesus Christ
every day in the Garden, and he applied Truth immediately.
There is a principle here for us: when we wait on the Lord, we will have
that time of being alone. But when that time is properly used for taking in Bible
Truth, it is the best possible preparation for appreciating your right woman
when the Lord brings her along. Don’t knock being alone with God it is not
loneliness! It has dangers, since we are out of the Garden; but when being
alone, is of the Lord and it is used to take in Truth, it is the greatest thing in the
world! It is better to be alone than tied down to the wrong man or the wrong
woman!
Before Adam had been put to sleep, he had been naming the animals; and
so the first thing he thought to do upon awaking was to give the woman a
name. Recognizing her as his counterpart, he said, “This is now bone of my
bones (Apparently he was clued in about the rib) and flesh of my flesh...”
(Gen 2:23) In other words, she had a human body; and although different from
Adam’s, it was one of his own species. “She shall be called Woman,” he
concluded. The Hebrew word “Ishah”; (Pronounced “ee-shah”) is beautiful —
much more euphonious, (Pleasant sounding) than the Greek word for woman,
“gune” (Pronounced “goonay”). Adam explained that he called the woman
“Ishah” because she was taken from “Ish” — the man.
For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined
to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were
both naked and were not ashamed. (Gen 2:24-25).
Since neither Adam nor Eve had a father and a mother, why did God bring
in the in-law concept here? This passage establishes a precedent: even though
in-laws did not exist, they WILL. Knowing that interference from parents would
be one of the greatest dangers to marriage, God firmly established the principle
of separation, which was to be applied from the beginning of time, to the end of
human history. Before in-laws ever existed, they are told to keep their noses
out of their children’s business when the children become adults. If you are
twenty or twenty-one, you can’t train them, period! So keep your nose out of
their business! When anyone leaves his father and his mother, he becomes
responsible for his own decisions. A man who asks a woman to marry him is
responsible for that decision. A woman who accepts some “monster” is
responsible for her decision.
In, (Gen 2:24) God sets forth the Divine institution of marriage: “and be
joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.” In other words, Adam and
Eve had sex in the Garden — perfect sex — right man — right woman! Under
this Truth, sex was one of the highest expressions of their relationship, and one
which cannot be duplicated on this side of the old sin nature.
It is not to be cheapened or distorted in anyway. Distortions come from the
sin nature and or from Satan. Distortions will emphasize sex without the right
man --- right woman, soul and or Spiritual life! But you cannot divorce one from
the other; in the true Concept which God designed. It is designed to be a
perfect relationship, and therefore, certain things are prohibited. For example,
adultery is prohibited, as it puts scar tissue on the soul. Any scar tissue on the
right bank of the soul has an effect upon the wonderful relationship which God
has designed. Other distortions are, of course, homosexuality and Lesbianism.
A Feminine soul was never designed to go with a feminine soul, and vice versa.
Bestiality is also forbidden.
Where does Satan enter the picture? In the last thirty years there has
been an unparalleled movement to break down Virtue morality in our country.
Satan, through the communist conspiracy and other media, has been very
successful in promoting this breakdown. Obedience to Laws, which was
designed by God to protect a nation, (Matt 8:8-12) also protects the
relationship of right man — right woman. How well Satan has succeeded in his
attempt to pervert God-designed sex, is evident everywhere today in such
practices as wife-swapping, pornographic activity, emotional concepts and
polygamy. The entire emphasis of sex has been relegated to the physical only,
so that the thing which makes it so marvellous and wonderful — the soul
relationship and Spiritual life — has been wiped out!
When frustration becomes intense enough, escapism and false stimuli are
substituted, which include heavy drinking, the use of dope and other things to
produce physical stimuli apart from that which God designed. Since sex was
designed for both believers and unbelievers. God has set down certain laws
that apply to both in this respect: protection of sex as an expression of the
coalescence of the soul and therefore, the forbidding of adultery and perversion
which takes sex out of its context.
No nation has survived a maximum number of sex distortions, as illustrated
by Sodom and Gomorrah in, (Gen 19:1-29). The Greeks in the Age of Pericles
became decadent and declined because of their homosexuality and resultant
drinking. Both the Athenian and Spartan civilizations declined for the same
reason. When the Romans came in contact with the Greeks, who were living in
Southern Italy, and learned to drink wine and took on the perversions of the
Greeks, there was a gradual breakdown of their own standards, and the
destruction of the Empire became inevitable.
Sex was designed — and this may shock some of you — for the right man
and right woman, and no one else! I have in my possession a paper which is
being written for a Doctor’s Degree in psychology in which the author
demonstrates from psychology that there is such a thing as a right man for the
right woman. How does he prove it? From the angle of sex. You see, the
concept of right man — right woman belongs to the unbeliever as well as to the
believer. The key is in sex. Anything that existed in the Garden had to be
wonderful. It still exists, and it is still wonderful; however, today we have an old
sin nature, which often drastically fouls up the situation. (1Co 7:1)
God explained to the first right man — right woman --- “joined to his wife:
and they shall be one flesh.” The right man and right woman are to become
one, and they are only one when they are united in the SOUL! And I want you
to understand something else: they were both naked — the man and his
woman, AND they were not ashamed. In this respect, there are two types of
people — those who might be classed as exhibitionists; who are not ashamed
of their body at all, and don’t mind letting everyone know just how much
voluptuousness is tied up in one package; and the shy, “I-want-my-privacy”
type. Of course, when the exhibitionist gets a few scars or wrinkles, all that
changes. But the right man and the right woman can be naked together, no
matter which category they come under and —get this— not be ashamed.
Now remember, the principle of right man — right woman occurred in
perfection, before sin and before children. It was designed for RECREATION
and happiness. Procreation was secondary. The idea that sex is only for the
purpose of having children is a distortion promoted by religion — not
Christianity. Religion always has a certain amount of asceticism. Distortions of
sex come just as much from asceticism as from lasciviousness or promiscuity.
Distortions of asceticism lead to a guilt reaction in the soul.
Now we move over into the New Testament where, (Gen 2:24) is restated,
and we are introduced to a new concept which had not been revealed in the
Old Testament.
ANALOGY TO CHURCH DOCTRINE
FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER
AND SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME
ONE FLESH. This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ
and the church. Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own
wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.
(Eph 5:31-33)
(Eph 5:31) is a quote from the “precedent” passage in Genesis. As we
have seen, this is love expressed in sex. The original marriage ceremony was
sex; and that was practiced throughout human history for several thousand
years. Today we have refined it a little. Now this passage further reveals that
the institutions of marriage illustrate a tremendous Spiritual Truth. “This is a
great mystery.” A “mystery” in the Bible is not something mysterious; it is Truth
not known in the Old Testament, and or made known to unbelievers and non
Spiritually mature believers --- but now revealed; (1Co 2:6; Heb 5:14) and it is
always a revelation of some facet of Truth. So the mystery here is not sex, but
the oneness of Christ and the Church!
At the moment of Salvation, we are placed by the Holy Spirit into union
with Christ. This is the baptism of the Spirit and is, as it were, the marriage of
the BELIEVER TO CHRIST. We are designed to be in Him and to complete
Him. As the husband gives of himself and his substance to his wife; so Christ
gives us His life, (Eternal life) His priesthood, His heir-ship, His kingdom, etc.
For every believer there is only one Saviour, one Lord, one way of Salvation;
and this is analogous to one man for one woman!
Now, as the woman is the glory of the man, (1Co 11:7) so the believer’s
union with Christ is manifested in the reflected glory of God. This glory comes
from what is called the “edification complex” of the soul. Every person has a
soul, which, though invisible, is the real person. But for the believer in Jesus
Christ, there is an edification complex for each soul, just as there is a right man
for a right woman. The edification complex, (Spiritual life) is the reflected glory
of God, in the believer’s soul; (Gal 5:22-23) and is based upon receiving the
Bible in our Spiritual Thinking, which is the Mind of Christ. (1Co 2:16) cf.
(John 4:24) The word “edification” in the Greek is the act of building or
constructing a structure. The Christian Life is a continual building or growing
process toward Spiritual maturity and beyond!
(1Co 14:20; Eph 4:13-15; Heb 5:14)
Until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the Knowledge of the Son
of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature which belongs to the
fullness of Christ. (Eph 4:13)
A Spiritually mature believer will have ten “floors” in the edification complex.
Illustration
How do you have full Spiritual knowledge of Truth in the human spirit? At
the moment of Salvation, the believer is given a “grace apparatus for
perception” (Operation Z) composed of the indwelling of God the Holy Spirit
and the activated human spirit. The human spirit enables the believer to fully
understand and use Truth. (1Co 2:9-16) Truth is cycled through the human spirit
into the right lobe where it is then ready for application.
But how well the believer actually does understand or use Truth depends
on the daily function of Operation Z. Bible Truth must be taken into the mind,
where it becomes “gnosis” (Knowledge understood only — (Eph 3:19);
“epignosis” or full knowledge surpasses “gnosis” — knowledge in the mind).
When Truth is taken in and understood in the mind, you do not agree or
disagree at this point. However, if it is believed, it is then transferred
automatically by faith to the human spirit where it becomes, “epignosis”
(Spiritual knowledge possessed). It must then be cycled back up into the right
lobe (Norm and standard lobe) for Divine Thinking and more advanced Truth.
This helps in finding your right man or right woman, right job, car, computer
etc., EVERYTHING MUST BE FROM GOD’S LEADING; or we have the
WRONG EVERYTHING in life!
When the grace apparatus for perception is functioning daily, the NEW
SPRITUAL BRAIN begins to BUILD in the soul; (Eze 11:19) and just as the
edification complex BUILDS UP IN the soul, so the right man fulfils the right
woman!
“Nevertheless” each individual among you also is to love his own wife even
as himself...” (Eph 5:33) Literally, this phrase says, “However, each one of you
keep on loving his woman according to the standard of one...” The “standard of
one” is right man — right woman — one for one! Love here, (“Agapao” in the
Greek) is a mental attitude love which comes from the soul. The man must
initiate from the soul, for the design is in the soul as well as in the body. His
capacity for this type of love is enhanced by the edification complex. (Temple in
the soul) “Agapao” for the believer is developed from two standpoints: the filling
of the Spirit, (Rom 5:5) and the edification complex. (1Jn 2:5)
“As himself” indicates a soul aggression. Unless a person is abnormal, it is
impossible for him to be indifferent to himself. In the right man - right woman
relationship, the man can only please himself in the full sense of the word by
fulfilling the right woman. (Eph 5:28) Since the body of the right woman
becomes the body of her right man, her body really belongs to the man. He is
the custodian of both her body and her soul: of her body and of her soul in
Spiritual fellowship. When the right man and the right woman have coalescence
of both soul and body, the benefit is mutual.
What about the wife? Is she to love the man? She is not so commanded,
for if it is a right man - right woman relationship, that will never be a problem.
Through out this passage the husband is commanded to love the woman, but
never vice versa. “And the wife sees that she reverence her husband.”
“Reverence” is the present middle subjunctive of “phobeo,” meaning “to fear.”
Is this saying that when you walk into the house, you bellow, “Woman!”
whereupon she trembles and cowers on the floor? Of course not!
Obviously, “phobeo” has another connotation besides fear, and that is
respect admiration or occupation with. (Obey and stay in fellowship with) The
right woman may have Personal Virtue love and Impersonal Virtue love for the
right man at different times; yet in fellowship with God the Holy Spirit, she will
admire and respect him at all times. Her feelings toward the right man will
always be strong. The key is Virtue love — and respect! That is the normal
Spiritual response to the right man.
However, your emotions can betray you. Beware of becoming sentimental
about a man whom you do not respect. Life is too short; forget him! If you can’t
respect a man, ladies, give him a wide berth. If you are a born-again believer
and you are cycling Truth from the human spirit into your right lobe as a frame
of reference, part of that frame of reference is what the Bible teaches about
right man — right woman, and you will understand that true Virtue love is based
upon the Spiritual life. (Gal 5:22-23)
THE RIGHT MAN IN THE SOUL OF THE WOMAN
No two women have the same type of soul, because the woman’s soul
was designed in eternity past for one man to fulfil. The right man fulfils each
facet of the soul, beginning with SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS. He goes into her
soul, and she can’t get rid of him; she can’t shake him. She may hate him at
times, and she may love him at times; she may respect him, and she may
despise him — but he’s there! He was designed to be there.
In the MENTALITY and CONSCIENCE of the soul, the right man enters
both lobes so that she thinks of him in a thousand different ways. It may be
complimentary, happy or sad, love or hate; she may think in terms of
admiration; in terms of “Why did he do that to me?” — But she thinks about
him! Someone else may come along and enter her mind for a minute; but he
goes right on through and out again. There’s just one right man!
In the VOLITION of the soul, the right woman wants to please and to
honour this man. From positive volition, when the right man enters her soul, she
says, “Yes, my lord,” and she is never more glorious or glamorous! There is
nothing degrading about recognizing one man as her lord. In fact, to the
contrary, she becomes the glory of that man! She possesses a glory there that
will never occur in any other way.
When the right man enters the EMOTION of the right woman’s soul, no
one will ever replace him. The Duke of Marlborough, one of the great leaders in
English history, married a wonderful woman with whom he had a marvellous
relationship. When he died, many men wanted to marry her, but she told each
one the same thing: “There has been one man in my life, and no man in this
world will measure up to him. He’s my man.” She refused them all, and lived out
her life with her right man still in her soul.
THE PERFECT DESIGN
Even the woman’s body was designed differently from that of the man. Her
anatomy is covered with erogenous zones. She was designed to respond to
and be fulfilled by her right man and at the same time to fulfill him. There are
certain ways in which the anatomy and physiology of one woman is designed to
respond to only one man. Although it is first of all in the soul, it overflows into
the body. Her response to the right man is intensive — it is physical — it is
intimate — AND IT IS GLORIOUS!
On the other hand, when the right man becomes involved with the wrong
woman, he is miserable until the day he dies. All the females in the world — the
most glamorous, the most beautiful, will never cut it. Without your right woman,
you are an unfulfilled man. There is only one woman who has a soul and a body
designed just for you, and that one woman is your half. And with some other
woman you are miserable! If you have the wrong woman, you are in a mess.
When a man has intimacy with anyone but his right woman, he is giving away
his glory, (Reflection) to others; he is depriving his right woman of that
response of glory.
The wrong woman will be cruel; she can’t help being cruel. You weren’t
designed to be with her. Everything you do in life is going to be neutralized by
having the wrong woman, and it will be a cause of grieving until the day you die.
Whether it is two who do not belong to each other or two who have been
unfaithful to each other — either way it goes — they will never get away from
the sadness and the sorrow. It can’t be drowned out or sublimated away. There’
s no way you can change it. There’s one right man for one right woman. No one
else will do!
The Jews of Judah illustrate this principle perfectly...
"How long will you go here and there, O faithless daughter? For the LORD
has created a new thing in the earth-- A woman will encompass a man."
(Jer 31:22)
This verse is a warning to the Jews against apostasy, or the “fifth cycle of
discipline.” (Lev 26:27-39) The backsliding daughter is Judah pictured as a
woman. An analogy is set up between the Jews and their relationship with the
Lord, and the right woman’s relationship to the right man. The Jews were to
have one Lord! This is why their idolatry got them into so much trouble. Idolatry
is often illustrated in the Bible by fornication. (Eze 16:1-63) Their backsliding
and apostasy resulted from negative volition toward Truth, to scar tissue on the
soul; and finally idolatry.
To awaken them to their apostasy and to remind them that there is only
one Right Man, (The Lord) for them, the passage goes on to say: “the Lord is
Jesus Christ, who is the Creator. (Col 1:16) Although He created man to
resolve the Angelic Conflict, He did not leave man alone. At the time of original
creation, He added a Doctrine — the right woman for the right man. Neither
polygamy nor harems were a part of God’s direct will! Therefore, “the Lord
hath created a new thing in the earth, A woman will encompass a man.”
(Jer 31:22) The true intension of this passage has been hidden in the English;
but in the Hebrew it is a revolutionary statement. When the Lord Jesus Christ
built the woman, what did He do next? He led the woman over to the man —
and the woman encompassed the man!
“Woman” in this passage is not “Ishah,” which emphasized the whole
woman. Instead, the Scripture uses “nequbah” here, which is the Hebrew word
for female and emphasizes her physiology. The woman’s body is different from
the man’s body. The next word, “tesobeb,” is the piel imperfect of the word
“sabab,” translated here “to surround or to encompass,” and actually means “to
embrace or to fit.” A woman shall fit a man. Her body is different from the male
because she is designed like a lock. Did you ever get the wrong key in a lock
and jam the whole apparatus? That could be the story of your married life for
the next fifty years if you get the wrong man or the wrong woman!
There is only one man who is designed for a specific woman. Your life may
be characterized by “Operation skeleton key,” (Fits many locks) but it won’t
work! Promiscuity destroys the whole concept of sex. A lot of you think, “so
what, if I have a little fun now!” Are you ever mistaken! You are so far out of
line in your thinking that you are going to make hash out of your life.
But there is a secret to happiness in this passage that is so fantastic
physiologically that when it occurs, the right man and the right woman might
even rear back and say, “It’s so great, there must be something wrong!” The
secret is in this phrase: “a woman shall fit a man.” It describes the design of the
right man and the right woman. They have a perfect soul and physiological fit;
and as a result, their relationship becomes something which is utterly fantastic
and cannot be duplicated with any other person in the world. Now that is what
is being taught here.
We understand that the man is the aggressor; but a man can be an
aggressor with the wrong person, and it’s no good. The woman must fit or
embrace the man. The Word for “man” in this verse is literally, “hero” (“Gaber”
in the Hebrew). In other words, when the woman encompasses the right man,
he is no longer just a male he is her hero — her right man!
If you are single, I want to inject an application at this point: promiscuity
can lead to more unhappiness than almost anything, with the possible exception
of mental attitude sins. IT ISN’T WORTH IT, because in all of this vast world,
there is just one opposite number for you designed in eternity past — JUST
ONE! And you don’t have to worry — God isn’t going to lose her or him in the
computer. Another pitfall to avoid is that of “any port in the storm.” At some
time or another, almost everyone has been “Dear Johned” or phased out, and
has had some thought along this line. You young people watch out for this trap;
it is the devil’s own lie and can lead to tragedy.
THE GLORY OF THE MAN
For a man ought not to have his head covered, (By long hair) since he is
the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man. (1Co 11:7)
This explains the concept of “hero.” The right woman is the glory of the
man just as the believer’s Spiritual life is the glory of God. First, look at, (1Co
11:13). “Judge IN yourselves: is it proper that a woman pray to God with her
head uncovered?” The answer is “NO”; but how is she covered? (1Co 11:15)
“...Her hair is given to her for a covering.” But with the man, the Bible says,
“Does not even nature itself teach you that if a man has long hair, it is a
dishonor to him?” (1Co 11:14) This is teaching the relationship of the right man
— right woman.
There are two glories given to the woman in this passage: her long hair is
a glory as well as a sign of her submissiveness to the right man. The contrast
between the short hair of the man and the long hair of the woman indicates their
roles in life. The man is the aggressor and the woman is the responder.
However, the woman in her sin of ignorance failed. She became the aggressor,
while the man played the woman’s part.
Generally throughout history where men have long hair, you are looking at
overt signs of a decadent society. Never has there been a society that
practiced homo-sexual-ism without the comparable “long hair", such as the
Greek society in the Age of Pericles. And interestingly enough, at the beginning
of Roman power, the Romans had short hair, as is evidenced by the images of
many of the great Romans carved out of marble and metal which have survived.
Obviously, the artists who have painted the pictures of Jesus Christ with long
hair didn’t know anything about the Bible, for the Bible is His Thinking, and it
declares that it is a shame for a man to have long hair.
Man as the “image of God” has to do with the characteristics of the soul:
man has self-consciousness — God has self-consciousness, or awareness of
self; man has mentality — God has infinite mentality; man his volition — God
has sovereignty; man has emotion and appreciation — God has appreciation;
man has norms and standards — God has norms and standards.
As the glory of God, man is a “nobleman”, (Greek, "aner") or a believer
responding to Truth. You see, the whole system of Operation Z has analogy to
the relationship between the man and the woman. Jesus Christ initiates Truth
toward the believer, as the right man initiates love toward the right woman.
LIKE SEX, Truth is placed in the soul through the grace apparatus for
perception, and conception takes place in the human spirit, (Jas 1:21 —
“implanted” — implanted or impregnated Word). The “seed” is Truth,
(Luk 8:11) and the responder is faith, which transfers that Truth from the mind
to the spirit were it becomes “epignosis” (Spiritual Thinking; 1Co 2:12-13)
The pregnancy in the human spirit leads to four categories of children:
(1) Frame of reference children. This is Truth cycled back to the right lobe
from the human spirit for more advanced Truth, as well as Divine norms and
standards, (2) The “exhale twins.” Truth is exhaled from the human spirit out the
left bank of the soul toward God through faith-rest and prayer; and out the right
bank toward men. (3) The eyesight children, by which we see and understand
God in true perspective. (4) The Operation Z children: grace orientation,
mastery of the details of life, relaxed mental attitude, capacity to love
Personally and Impersonally, inner happiness and Occupation with Christ.
In other words, there is no production from Truth unless it is believed and
therefore transferred to the place where it can be utilized. When man is the
glory of God, it is because he has an edification complex, (Temple; Spiritual
life) of the soul.
Now notice the rest of the analogy: “But the woman is the glory of the
man.” When the right woman is fulfilled by the right man, then the woman
reflects the man’s Virtue. First of all, he fulfils her soul, then her body, and she
becomes his glory. But she can be glory for ONLY ONE MAN! When the right
woman receives from the right man, he sees her in an intimate glory which can
never be surpassed in time! Foreplay and or intimacy therefore, were designed
to give overt expression to this relationship; and she reflects the glory of the
man, just as the Spiritual life, which can never be surpassed, reflects the glory
of God!
RESPONSE TO THE WRONG MAN
“The one who commits adultery with a woman is lacking sense; He who
would destroy himself does it” (Prov 6:32)
This is stated from the standpoint of the man, but the principle applies both
ways. In adultery, the wrong woman gets the wrong man, and something is
destroyed in her responses: in the soul, scar tissue forms physically and sex
isn’t what it should be. Adultery also has an effect upon the body.
Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then
take away the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute?
May it never be! Or do you not know that the one who joins himself to a
prostitute is one body with her? For He says, "THE TWO SHALL BECOME
ONE FLESH." But the one who joins himself to the Lord is one spirit with Him.
(1Co 6:15-17)
There is an analogy here: just as the believer is in union with Christ, so
there is a right man for a right woman. There is only one Savior, and every
believer is in union with the Savior. Then the analogy crosses over and shows a
violation: the right Savior is the Lord Jesus Christ and HIS right body and spirit
is the believer and HIS ALONE! How shall the right man go to the wrong
woman; any more than the believer should worship someone other than the
Lord Jesus Christ? Definitely not! He violates both sides of the analogy, which
is developed in the following verses:
Flee immorality. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body,
but the immoral man sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your
body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and
that you are not your own? (1Co 6:18-19)
Fornication, mental, physical and Spiritual, are to be avoided like the
plague! Why? Other sins are outside the body; but fornication is sinning against
your own body. In the woman, the build-up of scar tissue leads either to
nymphomania or frigidity; the man will be short-circuited so that his ability in the
expression of love with the right woman will be destroyed. Add to this a guilt
reaction, which usually accompanies such activity, and you have a man
becoming a baby while a woman turns into a tiger with all the revenge tactics.
Again the man’s and the woman’s roles are reversed!
ONE RIGHT WOMAN FOR ONE RIGHT MAN
Monogamy is ordained by God to demonstrate that God has a right man
and a right woman for each individual.
Now concerning the things about which you wrote, it is good for a man not
to touch a woman. But because of immoralities, each man is to have his own
wife, and each woman is to have her own husband. The husband must fulfill his
duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not
have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the
husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
(1Co 7:1-4)
There must be coalescence of souls before the body comes into the
picture at all. Why is pornography so popular today? Because there are so
many men with wrong women that they must conjure up images in their minds
with someone else before they can make love to the person with whom they
have a lifetime sentence. It is violation and distortion of something that is
wonderful; and it is tragic what this kind of thing does to a society. Sex is
reduced to animalism. In the lower creation, the animals do not have souls.
Animals will mate with any one of the same species; the animal isn’t particular.
It acts only on instinct, and for procreation.
Homosexuality, lesbianism, and masturbation are not any kind of an
answer. A woman is designed for a man, and a man is designed for a woman
— BUT NOT JUST ANY MAN OR ANY WOMAN. There is a RIGHT MAN and a
RIGHT WOMAN! It has been true since before man sinned, and nothing will
ever replace it. You can drink every bottle in town; you can sublimate in every
way humanly possible; but right man — right woman relationship cannot be
replaced. There is just one right man and one right woman, and when the two
get together, it is the greatest thing in the world. God’s design is perfect! And
the happiness derived from a right man-right woman relationship is perfect —
for both believer and unbeliever.
Enjoy life with the woman whom you love all the days of your fleeting life
which He has given to you under the sun; for this is your reward in life and in
your toil in which you have labored under the sun. (Eccles 9:9)
When the right man marries the right woman, even though they are
unbelievers with an otherwise empty life, (Life of vanity) both can find great
happiness in that relationship. Now, this statement is a rather startling one.
There are very few instances such as this where any happiness outside the
plan of God and the grace of God can actually exist. But here we have an
exception: an unbeliever, or even a believer with scar tissue on the soul, can
find the right woman, the right man, and still have happiness in that relationship.
Now, why is this so important? Because it emphasizes a principle: if an
unbeliever with an empty life can be happy with the right woman, just think what
you can be as a believer with a COMPLETED edification complex, (Spiritual
life, Temple in the soul) and the right woman, or right man! There’s no end to it
— it’s just fantastic!
HOW TO RECOGNIZE RIGHT WOMAN OR RIGHT MAN
One of the questions asked most frequently, and one I am sure many of
you are waiting for, is “How can I tell when it’s the right man, or the right
woman?” There are many signals, but the best solution to build an edification
complex in the soul. (Reach Spiritual maturity) Then you will have a built in
radar set that gives you the blips on the screen to KNOW WHO THE "RIGHT
ONE" IS and or KNOW WHAT THE "RIGHT EVERYTHING" ELSE IS; THAT
GOD PROVIDES! (Eph 3:20-21)
In other words, “don’t worry” about it at all, just work on the edification
complex. (Matt 6:32-34) I never saw a person with a completed Spiritual life
that didn’t have enough sense to know when the right one comes along, but I
can’t assume that all of you have working edification complex. So there has to
be another way.
When I think of all the knuckleheads who take out some doll and test her to
see whether she is the right woman, or the girls who on the first date ask how
many children he wants or what kind of furniture he likes, I understand why so
many are running scared! Some of you ought to shape up a bit. When you have
a date, it should be something innocent. It may cut the loneliness, but that
person isn’t your right man or your right woman. If you’re under 22 or 23, you
don’t have enough knowledge yet to know what right man or right woman is!
Now remember, the Principle of right man — right woman is for
unbelievers as well as believers. The recognition signals are for both
categories. I should like to suggest eight of them, all from the Song of Solomon.
In most of these passages, the Shulamite woman is speaking of her shepherd
lover — right man right woman. (Christ and growing believers and or Spiritually
mature believers)
(1) Personal Virtue love involves God and ONE person in your soul whom
you never forget and cannot erase. (Impersonal Virtue love involves ALL; and
even enemies; Brotherly Virtue love is for believers Thinking with Truth) “Tell
me, O you whom my SOUL loves...” (Song 1:7) Someone who merely turns you
on physically, but is not in your soul, is not the right man or right woman. The
right one will be in your soul FIRST. Physical attractiveness is not eliminated,
but it isn’t the key. When a man, (Or woman) is very tender at one time, and
very tough at another, yet he is still in your soul, that’s the person. Your soul will
photograph a person and that person is there forever. So your recognition of
right man or right woman begins in the soul.
Today sex or body love has been emphasized to the exclusion of soul love.
The movies, books, Satan’s system and advertising, all glorify sex, completely
apart from the soul. I have concluded that this is why so many are asking the
question concerning identification of right man or right woman. They hear
nothing but the body and sex and don’t even know they have a soul. As a result,
young people are getting their soul-kicks from drugs. There is an element in this
country today which goes in for socialism in sex, which is nothing more than
indiscriminate sex practices, or free love. But since there is no soul relationship,
they are escaping with sex and drugs! The whole Principle in emotional training,
even in medical school, it is focused on the body. Consequently, there is
increased fornication on the one hand and homosexuality on the other!
You teenagers should have an empty soul, as far as right man or right
woman is concerned. Your capacity for Personal love for God and right man
right woman is not yet ready. You should be filling your soul now with norms
and standards and Divine THINKING from Bible Truth so that you will have the
basis upon which to identify the right man or right woman at the right time.
Recognition occurs in your soul, not in your physiological being.
(2) Virtue love demands knowledge. “May he kiss me with the kisses of his
mouth! For your love is better than wine.” (Song 1:2) As a person learns about
the quality and uses of wine, so a man needs to know something about women,
and particularly about one woman, under all conditions. There never was a
woman who didn’t have many sides; and if you are such an idiot that you see
only one or two — sex and food, for example — then you have missed
something really wonderful in life — the whole point of the Doctrine of right man
and right woman. A lot of you are never going to find your right man or right
woman because you don’t know a thing about people.
You girls, by the same token, need to understand something about men.
For example, you need to recognize the “wolf.” This type of man has a
fantastic, though misplaced confidence in himself, based on pride. He believes
that women cannot resist him. Women who are dumb about men are always
impressed by this pseudo self-confidence. Frequently, when a man makes such
a point of self-confidence, it is a veneer to hide insecurity. A man who assumes
that he is irresistible to all women is in great danger Spiritually as well as
physically and mentally. Excessive love of self — operation “over-think” —
destroys the capacity to love in both the male and the female.
For through the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to
think more highly of himself than he ought to think; but to Think so as to have
sound judgment, (Humility) as God has allotted to each a measure of faith.
(The Thinking of Christ) (Rom 12:3)
Relationship with others, other than the
right man or right woman destroys the whole Principle which God has designed.
I am sure the “chaser” has never considered that his whole operation is anti-
God, because God designed the right man for the right woman. Although
Solomon has been regarded as a great lover, he was actually the most
frustrated person alive. After so many women, he no longer had the capacity to
love. Promiscuity put so much scar tissue on his soul, it knocked him out.
Solomon’s aggressiveness was related only to his selfishness and
egocentricity and not to his love; but thought only in terms of what he wanted to
do. Aggressiveness related to true Virtue love always considers the desires of
the one he or she loves. A man doesn’t have to do a lot of things to be happy
under true Virtue love; all he needs is for the woman to be happy.
From all outward appearances, Solomon was the most desirable man in
the world: he had great physical beauty, he was the wealthiest man of his day,
and he had extra ordinary wisdom. But a smart woman would think twice right
here — This type of man will have to break a lifelong habit of self-centeredness
in order to find the right woman; otherwise, he will make an extremely poor
lover. The woman’s feelings, her soul, or her body will never be considered.
Egotism works on egoism in this type of man.
Let’s stop and get a Principle right now: experience does not make a
good lover! This is one of the greatest fallacies in right man --- right woman
love. A lot of women are deceived on the idea that they need experience in
order to be a good responder. But it is not experience which makes a good
lover — it is the RIGHT MAN and the RIGHT WOMAN! Experience is the result!
This also brings out another great danger; many times a woman will go for
a man because she thinks everyone else’s is going for him!
Now, what about the current idea that in order to repay a man for a nice
date, you must kiss him goodnight; or you must show your appreciation for the
amount of money he spent on you by an equal amount of “necking”? The
argument is that if you don’t, you won’t be popular, you won’t be invited out
again, etc. Well, so what? You’ll also avoid all the pitfalls this kind of activity
invites. Physical response should come only from soul response; and it is
impossible in the course of a date or two to determine true soul response.
(3) Virtue love is protective, both when the right man is present and when
he is absent. When present: (Song 2:4) “He brought me to the banqueting
house, and his banner over me was love.” The word for “banner” means a
“Standard of protection.” (Truth in his soul) The right man is not only her Lord,
he is her protector at all times. When absent: (Song 1:13) — “A bundle of
myrrh is my well-beloved unto me; it (Literally) shall lie all night between my
breasts.” Myrrh has a very lovely aroma. In the ancient world, a woman wore a
bag of myrrh all night, which hung between her breasts. This pictures the sweet
fragrance of memories of the right man in her soul when he is absent. She is
protected in his absence by this fragrance of memory. The right woman can go
anywhere in the world and be protected by the memory of her right man. This is
a beautiful picture of Truth protecting the believer from temptation.
(4) Virtue love must come from volition or free will. “...Do not arouse or
awaken my love Until she pleases." (Song 2:7) The word “pleases” indicates
volition. True love always involves the operation of free will. Any man who
seeks to destroy or coerce the volition of a woman is the WRONG MAN! The
right man recognizes that what isn’t freely given isn’t worth having. Some men
will never understand what true love is all about because to them a woman is a
“slot machine”: you put a coin in a slot and get sex. There’s no volition involved
in this kind of activity. Although a woman is a responder, once she is positive
toward a man, she becomes aggressive in pleasing him. Response in itself has
an aggressiveness. This is declared in the woman’s volition.
(5) True Virtue love is tone-oriented. “Listen! My beloved! "My beloved
responded and said to me, ’Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, And come
along.
(Song 2:8-10) Right man and right woman respond only to each other! A right
man, (Or vice versa) can always tell the mood, the status of the condition of his
right woman by the tone of her voice!
(6) The woman’s love responds to the right man when present: “Let his left
hand be under my head And his right hand embrace me.” (Song 2:6) And when
he is absent: “On my bed night after night I sought him Whom my soul loves; I
sought him but did not find him.” (Song 3:1) We might say in modern
colloquialism, “he turns you on.” This is not ordinary libido; any normal, healthy
body has that at times. I’m referring to something beyond libido. I am almost
afraid to give this for one reason: some people in the midst of a wave of libido
see a big smile and hear a fast line, and they assume that “this is it.” And it isn’
t! They are just caught in a wave of libido and are impressed by certain
personalities; but it doesn’t mean a thing.
Personal Virtue love in the woman, triggers insatiability to the point of total
desire and a total surrender that excludes even her natural pride. (By reaching
Spiritual maturity) The right man’s aggressiveness and passion will be
consistent and these will satisfy her soul and, later on, her body. There’s an
elapse of time here, for remember, soul Virtue love MUST PRECEDE sex love!
The woman who experiences this for the first time often cries; it is just too much!
(7) When unreciprocated, love can cause a strange illness, for which there
is only one cure: Sustain me with raisin cakes, Refresh me with apples,
Because I am lovesick.” (Literally) (Song 2:5) “Raisin cakes” and “apples” are
tantamount to smelling salts. She is love-sick with unreciprocated love for her
absent shepherd lover.
(8) Personal Virtue love is recognized by the two persons involved. “I am
my beloved’s, and my beloved is mine...” (Song 6:3) “I am my beloved’s, and
his desire is toward me.” (Song 7:10) There is no doubt about her lover; she
has absolute confidence regarding her right man.
THE COMMANDS FOR MARRIAGE
“But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife
should not leave her husband. ” (1Co 7:10)
The Principle of right man — right woman is behind this Command. But,
you may say, Why, if I ever find the right man, would I want to leave him?” NO
you’ll want to see him gloriously happy!
If it is the right man — right woman and you do have a squabble, (Rebound
immediately; Eph 4:26-27) because there will never be anyone else! You may
go shopping around; but, if you marry someone else, you’ve had it!
I know of several cases where if was apparently right man — right woman,
but having married in their teens, which is a ghastly mistake, they were too
young to realize that they had “lucked out.” So they broke out, divorced,
married another, and then realized that the first one was the right one. But ,
Biblically speaking, they can never go back together. The marriage has been
short-circuited, and it’s all over. Reconciliation must take place before such a
tragedy occurs.
The point of this is that in the case of right man — right woman, if one or
the other leaves, no matter whether he (Or she) stays away a long time or a
short time, don’t go out and marry someone else. Get patched up! (Be
reconciled)
GRACE GIFT FROM THE LORD
When the believer marries the right woman, he has received grace from
the Lord. (Prov 18:22) “He who finds a wife finds a good thing And obtains
favour from the LORD.” This verse has been badly distorted because of its
poor translation. I have heard emotional male-types, just back from their
honeymoon, say, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing — and I’ve found a
good thing!” And she blushed, and he glowed, and everyone beamed at the
young couple, and it was sickening! A good rule of thumb is to keep your mouth
shut for at least a year; and them if you still feel the same way, quote the verse
correctly: “He who finds a GOOD WIFE” — not a “good thing”; Just getting
married is not necessarily a good thing; you can find a wife and find a bad thing!
In fact, Proverbs warns about a nagging woman! Do you know what a “good
wife” is? Right woman! “He who finds the right woman receives GRACE FROM
THE LORD!” (Literally) The point is, when the believer marries the right woman,
it is the GRACE OF GOD! The alternative to this grace gift from the Lord is a
life of misery and unhappiness!
“A foolish son is destruction to his father, And the contentions of a wife,
(Literally, the naggings of a wife) are a continual dripping. (Like Chinese water
torture) House and wealth are an inheritance from fathers, But a PRUDENT,
(WITH IT! CRAFTY IN A DIVINE GOOD WAY!) wife is from the LORD!
(Prov 19:13-14)
Marrying the wrong woman can be “Chinese water torture”; and this
disaster generally results from not waiting for the right one! You can inherit
many things, but the right woman comes ONLY from the Lord. He leads her to
you; but you have to wait for her; you have to be prepared, and you have to be
able to recognize her!
Exactly what is a “prudent” wife? “Prudent” is “Ishah” (Woman)
“maskaleth” (Wise or wisdom) in the Hebrew. The hiphil stem means “to cause
to be wise.” That means she is a believer, and she is functioning daily under the
grace apparatus for perception. (Operation Z) She has constructed an
edification complex in her soul. And when the Lord leads this kind of woman to
you, you have great blessing and happiness. Not only does the Lord bring the
right woman from the standpoint of her soul and body, but what makes it so
perfect is that she is Spiritually prepared. If you have to wait a hundred years,
SHE’S WORTH WAITING FOR!
THE SHEPHERD AND GUARDIAN OF THE SOUL
Just as the Lord Jesus Christ is the Shepherd and Guardian of the believer’
s soul, so the right man is to the woman’s soul. (1Pe 2:25; (1Pe 3:1) So that
we might understand the whole concept, let’s begin back at, (1Pe 2:24).
“And He Himself bore our sins in His body on the cross, so that we might
die to sin and live to righteousness; for by His wounds you were healed.
(Literally, reconciled).
Jesus Christ possesses all the essence of Deity, and therefore, as God,
He cannot die. Eternal life cannot die; immutability cannot change; sovereignty
is not subject to death; omnipresence cannot reduce itself to one point.
Consequently, in order to die for our sins, Jesus Christ had to become a true
member of the human race. All the sins of the world were poured out on the
humanity of Christ. The physical death of Christ did not provide our salvation; in
His humanity He died Spiritually. He was separated from God the Father and
God the Holy Spirit as He bore every sin in the human race in His human body.
(Isa 53:11)
Why was this necessary? The next phrase tells us: “we were dead in sins.”
The first man was perfect or innocent until he went negative signals toward
God; then he acquired an old sin nature, which rendered him Spiritually dead —
no fellowship with God. The sin nature is passed down to every member of the
human race so that we are all born Spiritually dead and without capability of
fellowship with God. (Rom 5:12)
When Christ went to the cross, He had a perfect righteousness which
satisfied the Father. The justice of the Father was satisfied when our sins were
poured out on Christ and were judged. The Father was completely satisfied
with the work of Christ on the cross. God is now free to love us without being
inconsistent with His own righteousness and justice. God’s love toward us
through salvation is fantastic and unique, based totally on His character. We
can do nothing to gain it, nothing to earn it, nothing to improve upon it; it is all of
GRACE. That’s why salvation is simply, “Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will
be saved.” (Acts 16:31)
The believer in Jesus Christ has the righteousness of Christ and the means
by which he can live daily unto righteousness — the grace apparatus of
perception; (Operation Z) furthermore, Christ becomes the Shepherd and the
Guardian of his soul.
“For ye were as sheep going astray, but are now returned unto the
Shepherd and Guardian of your souls.” (1Pe 2:25) One of the 40 things that
God does for the believer at the moment of salvation is to activate for him a
human spirit by which he can understand and fully possess Spiritual Thinking.
(1Co 2:12) This human spirit is an empty storage area for all the categories of
God’s Thinking that the believer is to Think with in time! (Psa 1:1-3) Through the
human spirit, Jesus Christ is able to guard our souls. His protection is “food.”
We are sheep; we have to have a green pasture — Bible Thinking, which is the
Mind of Christ; and when we take in Truth, our souls are protected from going
astray, through sin, false Truth and human old sin nature good.
The right man is also guardian of the right woman’s soul. This lays a
tremendous responsibility on the man. It requires orientation to the grace of
God and complete understanding of the plan of God. We see here why the
woman is called the “weaker vessel.” (1Pe 3:7) She is not necessarily weak
physically. On the inside a woman has a vulnerable soul. She has insatiability
toward the man. Only the man — the right man — can fulfil her soul. (Gen 3:16)
Once the woman finds the right man, she is dependent on him, and therefore,
she is called the weaker vessel.
This Principle becomes manifest at a very early age and is described by
the expression “boy crazy.” A teenage girl thinks all boys are wonderful — and
that is a characteristic of the weaker vessel. Since teenage dates are rarely
ever right man — right woman, the young man must be aware that he has a
responsibility to guard the young woman’s soul for her right man. While some
teenager is dating his future right woman and guarding her soul, he is dating
another’s future right woman and guarding her soul. Therefore, teenage dating
places great responsibility on the young man in avoiding anything that would
build scar tissue on his soul and the soul of his date!
When a woman loves a man, she has the “instincts of love” She
automatically does the things that please him. (Col 3:22) The woman’s job is
declared to be to please her husband. This is a Biblical Principle of Virtue love.
It is described in, (1Pe 3:1-6) as subjection or submission to her right man. She
is under the authority of the man, although it is not designed to be intolerable
slavery, but a life of happiness! (When both have Spiritual maturity) Why?
Because her insatiability is satisfied by this submission!
The woman from her own volition surrenders her freedom to the right man
at marriage. She is not making a trade-out protection for giving her body to a
man; she surrenders her soul. The man in turn has the responsibility of fulfilling
her soul. Compatibility begins with the inner life, not with an overt attraction. A
woman gives to the man she loves all that she has — not money or status
symbols — but her soul and her body. But never get the cart before the horse
— the soul must come first. When her soul is given, then the expression of
intimacy through the giving of her body becomes a most fantastic thing.
Anything else is meaningless. If some of you men have wondered why things
have never clicked with you after the honeymoon, you may have forgotten that
a woman has a soul, and the soul must be filled. She is a vessel; she is a
vacuum seeking to draw something in to her soul; that something is: The Virtue
love and Truth of the right man!
All women have a norm or standard about men. This leads to preconceived
ideas, which can be a great danger, and renders women vulnerable. Almost
every woman enters womanhood with the dream of her man as a knight in
shining armour. When some bird comes along with a fast line and an attractive
exterior, he appeals to her, and she immediately assumes this is her knight. He
may have no norms or standards, but she grabs him, shoves him into her armor
false thinking and marries him. Then she unzips the armor, and out comes a
“monster.” Many a romance has been ruined by marriage because the man had
been stuffed into an armor which didn’t fit him at all.
Before you ladies ever consider marriage, you should thoroughly
understand the Truth of “subjection.” You are surrendering your soul as well as
your body to the man you marry. You men should completely understand that
you are the guardian of the woman’s soul, as well as of her body. Such a
marriage becomes greater as the years advance. Before you ever enter into
marriage with a man, make sure he is the one you want for the guardian of your
soul and body. If he is just a sex athlete, a meal ticket or a status symbol or an
escape hatch — forget it!
Ask yourself, are you willing to make this man your lord? Are you willing to
do this for life? If not, you have the wrong man. To become one with a man, the
woman must surrender her freedom. In return, she receives his love, adoration,
protection and companionship. If it is the wrong man, marriage becomes
slavery; if it is the right man, marriage becomes one of the greatest blessings
of life!
THE SOUL AND BODY RELATIONSHIP
Found in the Song of Solomon are more passages of the Doctrine of right
man — right woman; which I want to bring to your attention.
"Put me like a seal over your heart, Like a seal on your arm. For love is as
strong as death, Jealousy is as severe as Sheol; Its flashes are flashes of fire,
The very flame of the LORD. "Many waters cannot quench love, Nor will rivers
overflow it; If a man were to give all the riches of his house for love, It would be
utterly despised." (Song 8:6-7)
The Shepherd lover is the “right man”; (Christ Jesus the Lord) the
Shulamite woman, (Growing and Spiritually mature believers) is his “right
woman.” In this passage, the shepherd lover is speaking to the Shulamite
woman. (All Believers) What he says to her --- and her response, beginning in
the middle of the verse, add up to one of the most beautiful pictures of Virtue
love. The categorical Principle in this passage is a combination of soul and body
relationship between one man and one woman, designed by God in eternity
past.
In the phrase, “Put me like a seal upon your heart,” we have the soul
relationship of right man — right woman. It is a Command by a man who is an
aggressor in the right direction, and who has properly assessed the situation.
He is facing his right woman; she is in his soul; he is in her soul, and they both
know this. Although he orders her, his order is based upon a relationship in
which he has previously recognized her volition; and in this case, she has
willingly surrendered her volition to the one who is in her soul. Every woman has
free will, and as far as a relationship with the opposite sex is concerned, there
is only one person designed by God who will be in her soul, to whom she will
also surrender soul and body, willingly of her own volition.
The Hebrew word for “seal” is a very special one — “chotam.” This is the
signet right which a woman carried around her neck. Usually it was suspended
on a leather thong or a chain or string, and was of such length that it dropped
between her breasts. In, (Gen 38:18) we have a similar illustration. When
carried by the woman around her neck, the signet ring indicated that she
understood there was one man who would fulfil her, who could wear that ring,
and the ring would fit. In other words, when the woman recognized that she had
something to give ONE MAN, she waited for him; and that is the story of Song
of Solomon.
The signet ring is said, first of all, to be upon the heart. The heart refers to
the “right lobe”; (Conscience or norm and standard lobe). This is the part of the
soul which is involved in having the right man in the soul. Remember, soul love
precedes sex love. The man must be in the right lobe of her soul before she
surrenders her body to him. Once in her soul the right man never leaves. There
is no way she can get him out; she will never be satisfied with another man.
She might be unfaithful, but she will never be satisfied. Ezekiel 16 describes the
frustration of a woman trying to erase her right man from her soul.
"Then I passed by you and saw you, and behold, you were at the time for
love; so I spread My skirt over you and covered your nakedness. I also swore
to you and entered into a Covenant with you so that you became Mine,"
declares the Lord GOD. "Then I bathed you with water, washed off your blood
from you and anointed you with oil. "I also clothed you with embroidered cloth
and put sandals of porpoise skin on your feet; and I wrapped you with fine linen
and covered you with silk. "I adorned you with ornaments, put bracelets on your
hands and a necklace around your neck. "I also put a ring in your nostril,
earrings in your ears and a beautiful crown on your head. "Thus you were
adorned with gold and silver, and your dress was of fine linen, silk and
embroidered cloth. You ate fine flour, honey and oil; so you were exceedingly
beautiful and advanced to royalty. (Eze 16:8-13)
"You adulteress wife, who takes strangers instead of her husband!
(Eze 16:32)
"You have borne the penalty of your lewdness and abominations," the
LORD declares. For thus says the Lord GOD, "I will also do with you as you
have done, you who have despised the oath by breaking the Covenant.
"Nevertheless, I will remember My Covenant with you in the days of your youth,
and I will establish an everlasting Covenant with you. "Then you will remember
your ways and be ashamed when you receive your sisters, both your older and
your younger; and I will give them to you as daughters, but not because of your
Covenant. "Thus I will establish My Covenant with you, and you shall know that
I am the LORD, so that you may remember and be ashamed and never open
your mouth anymore because of your humiliation, when I have forgiven you for
all that you have done," the Lord GOD declares. (Eze 16:58-63)
In the heart — that is, the right lobe, the right man fulfils the right woman
soulishly: he fulfils her norms and standards; he gives Divine Reality to her
romantic dreams; he provides fragrance of memories; he provides soul
stimulation. All bona fide intimacy emanates from the soul.
Right man-right woman do not stop with a soul relationship. Physical or
body relationship follows; and therefore, he adds: “as a seal (Or signet ring)
upon your arm.” (Song 8:6) The arm refers to the whole arm, including the
lower arm or fingers. It also means strength: “as a seal or signet ring upon your
strength.” A woman is strengthened by her relationship with her right man! The
ring is also a sign of that enduring relationship.
The Principle behind the soul and body relationship comes out in the next
phrase, “for love is as strong as death.” The Hebrew word for “love” is an
infinitive which becomes a noun, and is derived from the verb “ahab.” In the qal
stem, it means “to breathe hard, to pant, to desire, to be in ecstasy.” However,
the connotation here is right man — right woman When “ahab” is worked into a
noun by using the infinitive form, “ahabah,” it becomes a feminine noun, which
connotes Virtue love, (Right man — right woman) and it includes both soul
relationship and body relationship, in THAT ORDER.
The word for “strong” in the Hebrew denotes strength in the sense of
fortification. In Virtue love, the right man is a fortification. The right man is a
fortification around the woman’s soul and body. In fact, Virtue love is a two-way
street. Each fortifies the other, each protects the other, each satisfies and fulfils
the other. “As death” is an analogy to bring out the fact that billions of years
ago in eternity past, God the Father actually designed provision for your death
— dying grace. He also provided for your life — living grace, which includes the
right man or the right woman. Since both were designed in eternity past; a love,
which is strong as death, is a protective love.
“Love as strong as death” also goes back to the emphasis on the soul.
What leaves your body when you die? Your soul! And in a sense, you take your
right man or your right woman with you. You do not leave, as it were your
memories, your fragrance, or your soul relationship behind. Although the
comparative is not used, this also has the connotation of something stronger
than death. There are things in life that are stronger then death because they
were designed by God in eternity past.
Now we come to the enemy of love: “jealousy” is as severe as the grave.”
(Song 8:6) The mental attitude sin of jealousy, as well as other mental attitude
sins, destroy the capacity for Virtue love.
If you are perfectly clear on this, and you have never had one problem with
jealousy, you have probably NOT fallen in "human love," But you might as well
start taking in Truth DAILY, (Like two or three hours a day minimum!) just to
keep yourself in shape for right man or right woman!
Jealousy is cruel — harsh or hardened; it even means to have scar tissue.
And then follows an analogy; “as Sheol.” Just as the grave robs the loved one,
so jealousy robs of love capacity where right man or right woman is involved.
Jealousy causes the same type of bereavement, except that you become hard
rather than soft. When you lose a loved one through death, you are tender and
compassionate; but when you lose a loved one through jealousy, you are hard
and cruel. Right man — right woman is something God did in eternity past; but
jealousy is something YOU do.
THE INTENSITY OF TRUE LOVE
Fire is the perfect illustration of Virtue love. “Her (Love’s) flames are the
flames of fire.” This is the passion, the power, the intensity of Virtue love, the
fire that never stops burning. Virtue love is unique: “…A fierce flame.” As Song
of Solomon stands in the KJV, God is not mentioned. However, in the original
Hebrew, God is in this passage. Evidently, the scribes who translated the
Hebrew were ascetic and couldn’t imagine that God would sponsor anything as
much fun as sex; therefore, they removed His name in a very neat way: they
simply took out a dagesh, and “God” disappeared. There were no spaces
between words in the Hebrew; but by leaving the dagesh out, they hid the word
for “God.”
Following the reading, “flames of” “shalhebet” and “her” is “jah”; but with
a dagesh, it means “God.” “Jah", which isn’t the usual word, but a short ending
of it, is used instead of Jehovah in this passage to indicate that God provides a
right man for every right woman, whether believer or unbeliever. Therefore,
every right man — right woman relationship is from the Lord in the sense that it
was designed in eternity past. And the intensity of this relationship is described
by the analogy to fire.
“Many waters cannot quench love.” (Song 8:7) Water puts out fire, but all
the water in the world cannot put out this fire. What are “many waters?”
Pressures, disasters, difficulties, misunderstandings, and acts of unfaithfulness,
lies, mental attitude sins! Did you ever intend to pour water on a fire and
accidentally pour kerosene on it instead? Then you get the picture here. In
pressure the flames only increase.
A case in point is:
A wild donkey accustomed to the wilderness, That sniffs the wind in her
passion. In the time of her heat who can turn her away? All who seek her will
not become weary; In her month they will find her.“Keep your feet from being
unshod And your throat from thirst; But you said, ’It is hopeless! No! For I have
loved strangers, And after them I will walk.” (Jer 2:25)
Here is the, “right woman” but she has resorted to two escapisms:
infidelity and alcohol. “Keep your feet from being unshod” means that she is
taking off her shoes in some other man’s tent. (Sex) “And your throat from
thirst.” (Drunkenness) “But you said, “’It is hopeless! No!..” Never! And why?
“My right man,” this woman is saying, (Which by illustration is the Lord) “will
never forgive me; there is no hope; I am a lush and a tramp, for I have loved
strangers, and after them will I go.” She realizes that the right man is still in her
soul, but she has given up hope for reconciliation.
Now in, (Jer 2:32) — “Can a virgin forget her ornaments, (This is the right
man) or a bride her attire? Yet My people have forgotten me Days without
number.” Is the Lord unfaithful? No! Right man — right woman is the illustration
of God’s faithfulness. Remember, this woman has gone chasing; she is a lush
and a tramp; yet it doesn’t put out the fire. That should give some of you
something to think about!
(Jer 2:33) — “How well you prepare your way To seek love! Therefore
even the wicked women You have taught your ways.”
In other words, you have made love cheap; you have gone after a lot of
men, and you have taught others to follow your ways. But this doesn’t make
any difference, because, as the Right Man, the Lord is faithful. (Jer 3:12-15)
There is something here a lot of you will never understand, and some of
you are going to be hurt very badly if you don’t understand... No matter what
your right man or right woman does, it is not going to put out the fire. You can
get mad, you can be upset, you can fall apart, but you can’t extinguish the flame
— in time or eternity!
“Love”; (Song 8:6-7) refers to the right man — right woman relationship
designed by God. God designs everything in a permanent way, and this goes
back to the analogy of the flames which build up rather than become
extinguished. “Her flames are the flames of fire; the flame is from the Lord!
Many waters are not ever able to extinguish the love.” It is God’s design, and
that’s it!
“Neither can rivers overflow it...” The word for “rivers” denotes all types of
situations. “Rivers overflow” are maximum pressures, the most powerful
enemies of Virtue love. Whatever they happen to be, they can’t destroy it! It
can’t be inundated or swept away by a flood of pressures.
LOVE CANNOT BE PURCHASED
“...If a man were to give all the riches of his house for love, It would be
utterly despised” (Song 8:7)
“Despising, they would despise him.” Since it is God’s grace design in
eternity past, it cannot be purchased or bribed. Virtue love is not only one of the
greatest experiences in life, it is a road to grace orientation. (And it must be
freely received)
Always remember, a woman will never love a man she can use. She may
use his body, his brains, his bankroll, his status, his influence, his power, BUT
SHE WILL NEVER LOVE HIM! At best, she will be fond of him. At worst, she
will be bored with him. She may be entertained by him; she may be stimulated
by him; she may be flattered by him; but she will never love him!
Her right man will not be so used. She will love, admire and respect him
because he preserves her femininity and controls her bitchiness. She will call
him “lord”; she will look for him and find him in her soul. Once he is in her soul,
no other man will ever be satisfactory! She may pervert the Truth of right man
and right woman by mentally cheating on him, by fornicating with another man,
by killing a bottle of gin, but at the end of the party, when the bottle is empty,
when her temporary sex partner is snoring, when all forms of sublimation are a
dead end, or when she marries out of spite or hurts him with the wrong man,
she will discover TOO LATE that the right man is still IN HER SOUL! But
between them is a mountain of scar tissue. She is left with a love-sickness for
which there is no cure, a web of sublimation from which she herself cannot
escape. ONLY BIBLE THINKING, ONLY THE GRACE OF GOD can remove
the impassable barrier between that right man and right — a tragedy of two
people designed by God for each other becoming ships that pass in the night!
...If a man were to give all the riches of his house for love, It would be
utterly despised. (Song 8:7) cf.
Who has believed our message? And to whom has the arm of the LORD
been revealed? For He grew up before Him like a tender shoot, And like a root
out of parched ground; He has no stately form or majesty That we should look
upon Him, Nor appearance that we should be attracted to Him. He was
despised and forsaken of men, A man of sorrows and acquainted with grief;
And like one from whom men hide their face He was despised, and we did not
esteem Him. Surely our griefs He Himself bore, And our sorrows He carried;
Yet we ourselves esteemed Him stricken, Smitten of God, and afflicted. But He
was pierced through for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities;
The chastening for our well-being fell upon Him, And by His scourging we are
healed. All of us like sheep have gone astray, Each of us has turned to his own
way; But the LORD has caused the iniquity of us all To fall on Him. He was
oppressed and He was afflicted, Yet He did not open His mouth; Like a lamb
that is led to slaughter, And like a sheep that is silent before its shearers, So
He did not open His mouth. By oppression and judgment He was taken away;
And as for His generation, who considered That He was cut off out of the land
of the living For the transgression of my people, to whom the stroke was due?
His grave was assigned with wicked men, Yet He was with a rich man in His
death, Because He had done no violence, Nor was there any deceit in His
mouth. But the LORD was pleased To crush Him, putting Him to grief; If He
would render Himself as a guilt offering, He will see His offspring, He will
prolong His days, And the good pleasure of the LORD will prosper in His hand.
As a result of the anguish of His soul, He will see it and be satisfied; By His
knowledge the Righteous One, My Servant, will justify the many, As He will
bear their iniquities. Therefore, I will allot Him a portion with the great, And He
will divide the booty with the strong; Because He poured out Himself to death,
And was numbered with the transgressors; Yet He Himself bore the sin of
many, And interceded for the transgressors. (Isa 53:1-12)
For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though He was rich,
yet for your sake He became poor, so that you through His poverty might
become rich. (2Co 8:9)
Christ gave all the riches of His house for us; will it be despised?
"I am My Beloved’s, And His desire is for me! (Song 7:10)
End
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